The new live action How To Train Your Dragon could very well be the demise of planet earth. graphic by Laine Gaherty
Making a live action How To Train Your Dragon was quite possibly the worst decision to be made in the history of humankind.
How To Train Your Dragon (HTTYD) is a prime example of a cinematic masterpiece. Everything about the film enlightens the viewer as they gaze into the depths of a screen that portrays a story all too beautiful for this world. Life revolves around this film and this film only. Those who haven’t watched this beautiful movie have never felt true happiness and purpose. If our eyes and ears could be physically transferred to a dimension of beauty, this movie would be a portal. As one gazes into the hearts of the characters and animation, a sense of freedom spreads across their soul. As the iconic theme song spreads across the ears of those lucky enough to witness it, a tear representing life itself falls across the cheek of a child. Beauty competes with the very presence of this movie. John Powell, the composer of this film, is a living god. There has never been a protagonist so daring, attractive, and funny as Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III. I do admit that the sequels of this movie portray Hiccup’s model-worthy face in a better light, but the original Hiccup will always have a place in my heart. Toothless is an example of all good morals and positive character traits squished into the body of a ferocious dragon who is honestly more cute than scary. Hiccup’s gang is what the very ideal of friendship revolves around. BY GOLLY, THE ROMANCE PLOT BETWEEN ASTRID AND HICCUP IS TO DIE FOR. I aspire to be Astrid, she is a girlboss.
Some people like to view once in a lifetime art as… transformable. Recently, the once-idolized director of all the HTTYD movies, Dean Deblois, has made the fatal decision to turn magic into fake glitter. WHY, DEAN, WHY MUST YOU SACRIFICE THE SANITY OF HUMANKIND FOR AN ATTEMPT AT GREATNESS ONCE AGAIN? I admit, the actor choices for the characters are pretty solid. They resemble the characters and their personality. However, the CRUSTY, DUSTY, ABOMINATION of a mega puppet that portrays Toothless may be the demise of Viking kind itself. The limited amount of pictures on the internet of the movie scenes make me want to jump into the feeding den of the huge dragon portrayed in the first movie. Some pictures of the movie set look pretty cool as a whole, but once you zoom in on the individual dragons and characters, it just feels… fake. One of the reasons HTTYD is such a beautiful movie is because of the freedom that the Dreamworks animators had when portraying all of the characters. There are only so many emotions a giant puppet can show on its fake face. With animation, however, there are endless possibilities. To try to make a live action movie of an animated film that is so creative, detailed, and magical seems quite hard to achieve.
The most terrifying aspect of this movie is that children of this generation are going to gravitate towards the newer and “cooler” live action version of HTTYD. It brings a tear to my face when I imagine the children of our generation growing up with a less magical version of a film that means so much to a certain, selective, awesome group of people. I hope all of the movie props are set ablaze in a fire (not really… (maybe)).
Who knows? Maybe this new adaptation of How To Train Your Dragon will end up being really well done. I hope that when I watch this movie in 2025, I will leave my couch feeling somewhat fulfilled. However, there is no possibility that the live action adaptation will become superior over the original. If this movie ends up being a trashy version of its inspiration I won’t be surprised, but I do hope I am when I decide to let my eyes succumb to the dark depths of this upcoming film. *cue theme music*
