Thomas Jefferson’s very hallways that will be filled with the new 2028 class next school year. photo by Emanuel Morales-Gomez
A guide for freshmen coming into the hallways of TJ for the 24-25 school year.
The hallways of high school can be scary for incoming freshmen. Between upperclassmen, embarrassing incidents, finding your classes, and more, it can be terrifying for new freshmen in our halls. Luckily, as a TJ Senior, I know all the tips and tricks for walking in our hallways. If you pay attention to these eight rules, you will make it through not only your freshman year, but every year after!
Always walk slowly. If you want people to like you and think you’re cool, always walk super slowly in the hallways. If you can get some friends to tag along and create a buildup behind you, that’s even better. Everyone will definitely love you!
Stand with your friends in the middle of the hallways. In between passing periods when everyone is trying to get to class, it is important to stand in big groups of people and get in everyone’s way. This will certainly encourage more people to talk to you. Standing in people’s way is the number one best conversation starter and best way to make new friends, especially at TJ, where we have such massive hallways.
Stop and/or suddenly turn around. When going with the flow of hallway traffic, know that it is totally okay to stop abruptly and even turn around, running into all the people behind you. Everyone will understand and will not find it annoying at all!
Knock everyone over if you are in a rush. If you need to get somewhere real quickly or think your time is more valuable than everyone else’s, then feel free to run through the hallways and hit everyone standing in your way. No one minds at all!
Get into fights. If you need to get your pent up anger out and decide to fight someone in the middle of the hallways, that’s absolutely acceptable. It’s a great photo op for your fellow students, and takes up no space or time at all. If you can accidentally punch someone outside of the fight, that’s awesome. The bigger the fight is, the better
Go up/down the wrong staircases. You will find that the stairways of TJ all have signs that will say which way is up and down for the students. You will also notice that everyone sees these signs as optional for a good reason! Only the coolest people go up the wrong stairs and force everyone to move to the side for them. Doing this makes everyone move aside for you, this gives you power above everyone else, like Moses parting the Red Sea.
Step on the back of everyone’s shoes (flat tire). Another thing that upperclassmen absolutely love is when you flat tire them. If you flat tire the person in front of you, they will likely turn around and give you a dirty look, but don’t worry – this is their way of flirting! If you can get a couple flat tires on one person that’s even better, because it’s a great way to make friends and even find a significant other.
When walking in front of people, swerve so they can’t go around you. If you are following the first rule, then you should be successfully causing a pile up of people behind you. Now if for some reason, the people behind you don’t love you and want to go around you, it is vital for your reputation that you maintain an inconsistent walking line so they can not go around you.
Now, after reading this guide, remember to follow every single one of these rules in order to get to your classes safely and make friends easily in the next school year. I hope you all have a great first year at TJ, and remember to walk slowly!
