100 Things that are Negative Aura

Riley Rimkus embracing negative aura moments. photo by Emanuel Morales-Gomez

Some of the most embarrassing things people do in day-to-day life. 

Negative aura is commonly defined as a point system in which your actions are given a number of points. The system is based on “aura,” which is basically how cool or embarrassing you are. Below are just some examples of negative aura: 

1. Tripping on the stairs, because how do you fall UP the stairs?
2. Walking down the hallway with your backpack wide open. Do you want someone to steal your books?
3. Dropping your metal water bottle in the hallway. Way to be obnoxious.
4. When someone is waving at someone behind you, and you wave back. 
5. When the server says “have a good meal” and you say “you too.” 
6. Gum falling out of your mouth in the middle of a conversation. Really sets a tone of embarrassment and vulnerability. 
7. Losing an argument with a child. Nothing says defeat like being outsmarted by someone who possibly still wets the bed. 
8. Accidentally sending a text meant for another friend to the person you’re talking about. Way to really soil your relationships. 
9. Walking into a glass door. There’s no way to have dignity after that. 
10. Accidentally liking someone’s old Instagram post. Way to send the message that you’re a stalker. 
11. Trying to push a pull door. Instant embarrassment and silent judgment. 
12. Walking confidently into the wrong bathroom. The ultimate “oopsie.”
13. Accidentally trying to get into the wrong car. Bonus points if someone is watching you from the inside. 
14. Tripping over yourself in public. Looks like someone didn’t play sports in high school!
15. Dropping your phone on your face in bed. Technology will always win, won’t it?
16. A spider dropping on you. Doing the hokey pokey in public? 
17. When you spill your water in a restaurant. Great, now you have to watch the server clean up your mess.
18. Saying “goodbye,” then walking in the same direction as the person. You lied. 
19. Laughing at a joke that was, in fact, not actually a joke, only to find everyone staring at you in silence. 
20. Trying to high five someone who doesn’t notice. Just leave your hand up in regret. 
21. Accidentally walking into a screen door. Sit in the mesh of embarrassment you made. 
22. Talking to someone with food in your teeth. Maybe don’t have the kale salad for lunch next time. 
23. Accidentally sending a selfie in a group chat. Now your kissy face is everyone’s problem. 
24. Wearing sunglasses inside. Someone’s a diva. 
25. Hugging someone who wasn’t going in for a hug. Try to recover from that. 
26. Grabbing something under the table then hitting your head on the way back up. Hurts, doesn’t it?
27. Falling off a treadmill. Just go home. 
28. Burning your tongue on hot coffee. Patience is a virtue, my friend. 
29. Running out of toilet paper at the worst time. Time to use your deepest creativity. 
30. Accidentally saying “love you” to a teacher. Didn’t know you were that close? 
31. Dropping your food right before you get home. It was bliss, until it wasn’t.
32. Forgetting headphones on a flight. Time to confront every heartbreak you’ve ever had. 
33. Waking up 5 minutes before your alarm. You were so close, yet so far. 
34. Getting a brain freeze. Pleasure comes with pain. 
35. Going to get something, then forgetting what you came for and why you got up in the first place.. Amnesia kicking in. 
36. Burning the popcorn. Sit with the smell of regret. 
37. Hitting your elbow on a table. Always find a way to remind yourself of the pain of living. 
38. Stubbing your toe. Nothing screams negative aura like toe pain. 
39. Slipping on ice in public. Maybe not the best time to explore your ice skating talents.
40. Forgetting your charger on a trip.  Must be time to disconnect. 
41. Dropping your money at the register. Wasting time?
42. Getting gum stuck in your hair. Time for a new haircut.
43. When you drop your pencil and it rolls away. Watch your hopes and dreams slowly fall out of reach. 
44. Dropping something in public and stopping to pick it up. Maybe pick up your pride while you’re at it. 
45. Running out of hot water in the shower. The ultimate, icy wake up call. 
46. When your shoe laces get untied just after you tied them. Time to double knot. 
47. Stepping in an icy puddle. Nothing says discomfort  more than soggy socks. 
48. Having your glasses fog up in public. Life is a constant blur, isn’t it?
49. Having a sneeze that just won’t come out. Now you have unfinished business. 
50. Having your sneeze interrupted half way through. Oh, stop teasing!
51. Trying to plug in your charger. Let’s play “the never ending scavenger hunt.”
52. When you’re talking to a group of people and they ask you to take a picture of them. Nothing like being demoted to “photographer” when you thought you were included. 
53. Being caught off guard in a picture. Here’s a photo of you impersonating a deer in headlights.
54. Getting stung by a bee in front of a group of people. Nothing says “center of attention” like a sudden scream. 
55. Missing your chair when trying to sit down. Took “life gets you down” a little too seriously? 
56. Singing a song, then someone turns off the music. Congratulations, now your dreams of being a singer have come true, except everyone is silent. 
57. Someone honking at you at a red light. Apparently being at the front of the line isn’t as appreciated as you thought. 
58. Failing when trying to unlock a door. Now even your door is playing hard to get. 
59. When you laugh at something with food in your mouth, and the food goes everywhere. Now you’re a human gumball machine. 
60. Trying to say something relatable and no one relates. Yes, it is just you. 
61. When the door dasher accidentally takes a picture of you. Thought you could avoid paparazzi today? I guess not.
62. When your bluetooth accidentally disconnects, and your phone starts blasting music. Congratulations, now you’re the uninvited DJ. 
63. Getting a paper cut. Nothing like a tiny object to remind you how everything turns on you. 
64. Throwing your phone on the bed, then it bounces back onto the ground. The bed betrayed you, and now gravity has turned on you. 
65. Dropping the soap in the shower. Let’s play the game of balance and reflexes. 
66. Putting the conditioner on your hand, then it falls off onto the floor. Nothing like your expensive conditioner turning into a floor treatment. 
67. When your hand soap slips out of your hand multiple times. Even the soap isnt ready for commitment.
68. Going up to your friend to say hello and it’s not them. Now you’ve made a new and confused friend. 
69. When it’s quiet and your stomach growls. Now your stomach has something to say in the seminar. 
70. Awkwardly trying to walk past someone who keeps trying to go in the same direction. Welcome to the real-world Cupid Shuffle.
71. When you’re in a public bathroom, and the toilet flushes before you’re ready. Now you’ve got the discounted version of a bidet. 
72. When your phone flashlight is on in a dark room. Hey there human spotlight. 
73. Sneezing in the middle of a conversation. Way to add some spice to the conversation. 
74. Checking to see if someone answered your message, and they left you on read. Nothing more like a slap from reality than being left on read. 
75. Missing the last step on the stairs, and acting like you didn’t just almost faceplant. Nothing like the casual recovery dance. 
76. Spilling coffee all over yourself when it’s too late to go home and change. Nothing says put together like a coffee stain. 
77. Trying to open a plastic bag, but it wont open. Human: 0, plastic: 1. 
78. Calling someone the wrong name, and realizing it too late. Think you’re too good, huh?
79. When the ketchup bottle makes an embarrassing noise in public. Time to swear it wasn’t you. 
80. Burning your tongue on hot food and having to play it cool. Just smile through the pain. 
81. Walking somewhere and realizing you’ve been going in the wrong direction. Looking to meet your step goal for the day? 
82. Accidentally liking your own post. There’s no better way to say “I’m self absorbed” than self promotion. 
83. Walking into a spider web. Now you’ve taken up karate? 
84. Noticing your shirt is inside out after being out in public for hours. The unintentional new fashion statement. 
85. When you’re the only one that laughs at your joke. Got a little ahead of yourself?
86. Waving at someone who doesn’t remember you. Nothing like a random reminder of 
87. Getting stuck behind someone who is a slow walker. Your pace has already been decided for you. 
88. When your voice cracks during a serious conversation. Suddenly your authority is gone.
89. Having your sneeze interrupted halfway through. Oh, stop teasing!
90. Going for a high five, then getting left hanging. Yet again your enthusiasm isn’t reciprocated. 
91. Seeing someone you know and forgetting their name. Cue the “Hey… you!”
92. Trying to unlock your phone, and it keeps failing to recognize your face. Way for technology to say “you are unrecognizable.” 
93. Burning yourself on a hot metal pan. A painful reminder that metal conducts heat. 
94. Seeing your reflection and accidentally scaring yourself. The realization that you’re your own jump scare. 
95. Biting your tongue while chewing. Now your own mouth has turned against you. 
96. Accidentally stepping on someone’s shoe in a crowded place. Now you’re just that person. 
97. Forgetting where you parked and wandering around the parking lot. A parking lot search with no map. 
98. When you type too fast, and you accidentally send half the text. Now the recipient is left with a cliffhanger about brunch.
99. Getting tangled in your jacket when trying to take it off. Now your jacket has decided to keep you close. 
100. Having an itch in a hard to reach spot, then pulling a muscle. Maybe don’t skip the yoga class next time?
101. Trying to slip out a silent fart and then it comes out not so silent. Great, now you’re a stinky trumpet.